How should we pray? Books have been written analyzing the Lord’s prayer and books teaching the methods of prayer and each with scriptural support and firsthand experience as to its effectiveness. These books are written by men much smarter and greater than I. Many have degrees and have credentials to support their vast wealth of knowledge. I am not going to discredit them nor do I intend to discount the things which they say. I believe there may be great value in the words that these books on prayer offer. I’ll be the first to admit that prayer is strange. It is a one way “conversation” with a God we can neither see nor hear. So that inherently makes it difficult to carry on this conversation. New believers are probably left wondering, “How do I start?” or “How do I know I’m doing it correctly?”
I’m going to impart my fallible wisdom on the subject by quoting scripture of my own and by citing my experience. But before I begin, let me make one thing clear. God is simple. Everything about God is simple. The problem is, we don’t understand him. It’s as though we are a two dimensional drawing trapped frozen on a page trying to understand a three dimensional artist who is moving through time. From where we sit, God appears infinitely complex. Our universe attests to that complexity doesn’t it? Let me challenge you with this, we do not understand God because he is “other”, not because he is complex. Do I claim to understand God? By no means! Rather God is completely infinite in his vastness. The main problem you and I have in understanding God is that we have a sin nature which distorts and perverts every glimpse of God that we get. So God appears twisted and even as a woven patchwork of our ideas. We will only know this simplicity when we get to heaven. My encouragement with all of this is to say, if you hear teaching or you read books that attempt to teach a complex gospel about a complex God, then you may not be reading wisdom. You might be reading foolishness.
Prayer is simple because God is simple.
In Genesis there is a familiar story of a man named Jacob. Jacob heard his brother was coming to meet him. After stealing his brother’s birth right, years of betrayal, lies, and treachery, Jacob knew Esau intended to kill him. That night, as Hosea 12 explains, Jacob wrestled with God. At the end of the match, just before Dawn, God commands Jacob to let him go, but Jacob refuses. Jacob stands his ground and says, “Not unless you bless me.” Jacob knew he was a dead man. Jacob had attempted to bring peace through a diplomat, but Esau responded by bringing an army, next he tried bribery by sending everything he had to his brother, and lastly, he tried to gain Esau’s sympathies by sending his women and children to meet him. There, alone with nothing to his name but the garments he was wearing, he finally came to a place of complete desperation. His prayer, in more modern language, went something like this, “Father, if you don’t save me, I am dead. And if I am to die, then I would rather die by your hands than Esau’s.” This is why God responds and tells him that he struggled with God and overcame. Jacob gave God an ultimatum. If death was going to happen, it was going to be God that carried it out. If God would not carry it out, then he had to spare him from Esau. This desperation came from a realization that only God could do what he was asking. Only God could save him because he had exhausted every other means and it was worthless. It was this vulnerability and honesty that pleased God so greatly! His son had finally gotten it. Jacob could no longer save Jacob. He could no longer lie or cheat or steal his way out of it. He needed a savior.
When you pray, it’s not about the eloquent words or the fancy thoughts. It’s not about the structure following the format outlined in the Lord’s Prayer. It’s about being with your savior. Consider the Lord’s Prayer, but ignore the structure for a moment, “Father, give us our daily bread, for we will starve otherwise, forgive our debts which we cannot repay, and deliver us from evil which, without you would devour us!” Do those words not sound like a desperate plea for salvation? If not an eternal salvation, most definitely the salvation of life our life on earth.
What’s so much greater than all of this is that throughout the gospels Christ teaches that God is a father who longs to give good gifts to his children. So even though these requests are desperate, they aren’t without confidence! You can pray knowing that God is actively working out your salvation. In that place where you can talk to your father, you can even ask for ridiculous things! Take that jetpack you’ve always wanted for example. It’s perfectly within God’s power to grant it, but it may not be within his will.
So how does this look practically? Imagine a conversation with your closest mentor and friend, but this time, image this is the one who holds the keys to the universe and fabricates everything from nothing. This is your savior and your king. Your requests are not taken lightly by him. Would you talk to your best friend using eloquent words and words plugged into a format and template? Of course not! And if you knew your friend had the power to rescue you from all of life’s evils and grant you gifts unfathomable, wouldn’t you spend as much time as you could with them?
Because I know we like 5 step programs and instruction manuals, I’ll give you some steps.
Share with God. Just talk to him. You don’t have to have some request in mind or lofty words to say. Just talk to God about life.
Be with God. Don’t be afraid to just sit his presence. Again, there is no need to have a “planned approach.” He’s your father and just like your earthly relationships, sometimes it’s good to just sit with someone without saying anything at all.
Ask of God. He’s your father, he wants you to ask things of him so that he can answer it. It gives him such immense joy to touch your life after you’ve come to him.
Lastly, do all these things often. I’m not talking about once a week or once a day during your devotions or quiet time, I mean all the time. Keep a running dialogue with God throughout the day. If it has to be out loud, try sneaking time in elevators when you’re along, on car rides home while stuck in traffic or even between commercial breaks of your favorite show.
The most important thing I can stress is this. Pray! And don’t worry about how it looks or what it sounds like. God built you unique and his relationship with you is different than anyone else’s. Your prayer life will reflect that. Pray and let the Holy Spirit do the work of shaping you and and your prayers while drawing you closer to God the father.